🚀 go-pugleaf

On Saturday, October 9, 2021 at 11:17:48 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> On Saturday, October 9, 2021 at 5:14:54 PM UTC-4, Zod wrote: 
> > On Friday, October 8, 2021 at 10:47:14 AM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote: 
> > > 
> > > Today's poem on the Shadowville Mythos blog, by popular demand: "Left Handed Summer" by Will Dockery (revised): 
> > > 
> > > Left Handed Summer 
> > > 
> > > Left handed Summer 
> > > alias Uncle Hugo. 
> > > I step out 
> > > into this night. 
> > > 
> > > [...] 
> > > 
> > > Read more at: 
> > > 
> > > https://shadowville-mythos.blogspot.com/2021/10/left-handed-summer.html 
> > > 
> > > *** 
> > Again... cool cool....
> Thanks again for the endorsement, Zod.

And thank you, Donkey -- I've been waiting for one of those all night.

"Thanks for the nod on my rod, General Zod.
Watch my rod nod at the sight of your bod.
I'll shoot my wad if you'll call me your God.
So thanks for the nod on my rod, General Zod.

"You know I love all the sweet things you say,
Look at my rod, it gets bigger every day!
And my ass is as large as a Chevrolet!
So thanks, General Wank, and keep slurping away.

"Thanks for the slurp on my sphinc, General Stink,
Slurp while I burp, play the perp to my twink.
Call me your blubber-butt, cuddly and pink.
And thanks for the slurp on my sphinc, General Stink.

"You know I’m grateful that you do me for free,
You even stand watch when I take a wee-wee.
Our lust is pure love, none can say it’s smutty.
Heh thanks, General Scruff, you’re a fluff Ph.D.

"Thanks for the lube on my moob, General Pube.
Open my shirt and we’ll star on YouTube.
My gut expands like a truck inner tube.
I’m thankful a rube loves my moob, General Pube.

“You know I adore when you dip on my dork.
You transform my fat bacon to hog-bottom pork.
We could take our act to East Coast New York.
Stand by, I thank, General Z, pop my cork.

"Thanks for the yank on my wank, General Stank
I’ll be your Bubba and you’ll be my skank
Pull down my tent pants and give me a spank
And thanks for the yank on my wank, General Stank.

“I love when you sodom my bod, General Zod
We're snuggled together like peas in a pod
Mind if I call you Todd, General Zod?
I can do what I want to because I'm your god.

“Merci for the head in the shed, General Zed.
You couldn’t hurt Dave when you bashed in his head.
I know and forgive since we all are inbred.
Oui oui, for the head in the shed, General Zed.

“We need to try keeping this on the down low.
I’m hiding your boots underneath my faux ‘fro.
You’ve influenced me more than PopEye and Ed Poe.
Gracias, General Ho, do you think Coco knows?

"Thanks for the pull on my pid, General Did
I’ll flip my lid when you find where it’s hid
Under my fat like a flat katydid
So thanks for the pull on my pid, General Did.

“Note that I whoosh when you smooch on my cooch.
You always are nearby as my service pooch.
Remember playing Navy in the waves of the Hooch?
You’re a dandelion Summer’s Eve, General Douche.

"Thanks for the lick on my stick, General Prick
I’ll flick my Bic if you’ll fondle my dick
Just watch out for dick cheese, we don’t want you sick
And thanks for the lick on my stick, General Prick.

“We know that your paintings are all photo fakes
But maybe they’ll buy us three Rochester steaks?
We’re living the life of no give and all takes.
Let’s post ‘til he wakes, take no breaks, General Shakes.

"Thanks for the toot on my flute, General Poot
Your tongue is a gerbil that scoots up my chute
I'll let out a "Hoot!" as we watch my splooge shoot
So thanks for the toot on my flute, General Poot.

"Adventure calls when you spelunk in my junk.
The Navy taught you not to recoil from funk.
To your nose, I’m perfumed, a Guano Cave Hunk.
So drive in your pitons, I’m sunk, General Skunk.

"Thanks for the hump on my rump, General Shlump.
Watch my rump jump with each thump-thump-thump-thump!
You paint like a chimp but you know how to pump
So thanks for the hump on my rump, General Shlump.

"You tidy the thatch when you tooth-rake my snatch
And don’t hesitate when the new weevils hatch.
They latch on my bod and have learned to play catch.
No spray is your match, don’t detach, General Scratch.

"Thanks for the smack on my crack, General Whack.
I’ll spread my butt-cheeks and give you a snack.
Friends come and go, but you’ve sure got my back.
So thanks for the smack on my crack, General Whack.

"You know I love when you chew on my waffle.
You look at my balls like a pita falafel.
We pledged our love, even though it’s unlawful.
A jail term’s not awful, or offal, General Brothel.

"Thank you for the hickey on my dickie, General Sticky
I don’t mean to be picky, but you’re smelling kind of icky.
Roll me over, Chickie Baby, and you’ll earn yourself a quickie,
And thank you for the hickey on my dickie, General Sticky.

"I love your work on my dork, Zod ol' chap. 
Your face in my waist, your head in my lap. 
I don't want to sound like a sap, 
But you're great when I don't want to fap. 

"Thanks for the blow on my toe, General Schmo. 
So glad you know how to go nice and slow. 
Sandy is handy, but yo is my ho. 
So thanks for the blow on my toe, General Schmo. 

“It’s always a treat when you kiss both my feet. 
You say they smell sweet though you can’t help but bleat. 
Please say you won’t cheat, I’m your meat on the street. 
You’re a seat athlete, come and eat, General Teat. 

"Thanks for the lay yesterday, General Gay. 
My legs will splay if you’ll come in and play. 
Clay’s gone away, so you’re welcome to stay. 
And thanks for the lay yesterday, General Gay.

“Please know that I love when you slop on my mop. 
You can't bear to stop unless popped by a cop. 
We could live out our days at the Sweet Gum Head-shop. 
Bop, bop, bop, plop, plop, plop, wanna swap, General Flop?

”Thanks for ingesting my shit, General Zit. 
I’ll sit on your face, but I cain’t do no split. 
A twit and a git make a wonderful fit, 
So thanks for ingesting my shit, General Zit.” 

"I love when you cook up that rat-a-tat-tooey. 
The meal is so tender and not at all chewy. 
I lost all my teeth so I like my food poo-y. 
I’ll misuse a French word for you, General Ennui.

"Thanks for ingesting my crap, General Sap.
Snap my jockstrap and I’ll give you the clap.
Squeeze my flap of fat and pretend it’s a pap,
And thanks for ingesting my crap, General Sap.
 
"Feel free to feed off my back and reply. 
Did you notice we posted 100 old lies? 
Will my body heat help your beard to drip dry? 
Shoe polish is great, you look young, General Fly.

"Thanks for the drool on my tool, General Fool.
I’m just a mule, but you think I’m so cool.
Too bad you smell like a rancid cesspool.
But thanks for the drool on my tool, General Fool.

"Thanks for the wank on my crank, Zod. 
Your stank on my flank makes me feel like a god. 
The rank stank on my flank 
Means I don't have to wank 
Thanks for visiting my bod."

-- Will Dockery, "Ode to My Slurp-puppet"